So, I was talking with a writer friend and asked her if I was crazy. Her response was don't confuse determined for crazy. That got me thinking. I am determined.
When the year began, I declared that for the first time in 37 years, I was going to have a year for me. Now, don't get me wrong. I am still providing for my kids and husband, and being an active role in their lives, but for the first time, I'm really doing some things for me. In January, I quit smoking - cold turkey. I woke up on January 6th and decided it was time. Instead of going downstairs for my morning cigarette, I took a shower and got ready for work. I was done with smoking. I haven't smoked since. I'm incredibly proud of myself. In March, I walked into a Medifast clinic and signed an 18 month contract to lose weight. The goal is 50 pounds. As of today, I have lost 26 pounds. I don't cheat on my diet (other than the occasional cocktail) and I lose weight every week. Again, I'm really proud of myself.
Now, I looking at my writing. I am no longer looking at self-publishing. I am determined to do what needs to be done to find an agent. If that means taking writing classes to get better, joining writers groups, and just writing all the time, then that's what I'm going to do. As I said, I am determined. I want it. I want it like I want a cigarette or a piece of cake. But unlike smoking and eating, I'm not going to quit/give up. I'm determined to work my ass off. I know that it doesn't stop at just getting an agent, too. I know there are drafts, and drafts, and more drafts. There are submissions, editing, marketing, and more. I get it. There's more work than I can imagine, but I'm ready. I'm ready to work hard because I will do what needs to be done.
So that's it. The year of Jamie is now. I know now, it's not crazy. It's determination.